Judge’s Critique

Contest:

Summer 2004

Title:

Author(s):

Claude Diamond

Result:

Judge’s Score Sheet

Category

Score

Notes

Emotional Impact

1   2   3   4   5

Hook

1   2   3   4   5

Originality

1   2   3   4   5

Appeal

1   2   3   4   5

Focus

1   2   3   4   5

Phrasing/Cadence

1   2   3   4   5

Form

1   2   3   4   5

TOTAL SCORE

33

Judges Comments

By the fourth line which ends in the hook, I was totally hooked in, line and sinker. Claude expertly paints the setting with great imagery, using assonance and alliteration all throughout the lyric. Though I'm rather tough on critiquing songs that try to evoke sympathy for the drunken bum/homeless because there are so many with the same, tired theme, I was 'tricked' by Claude's twist by making you see yourself through the eyes of the singer in a completely new way. Instead of invoking pity for the bum, there was a revelation that God is there even in the lives of people in the lowest state and you are not alone. And Claude does this expertly without preachiness or condemnation. By the time the second chorus kicks in, there is new meaning to the words and the message becomes even more powerful. Great job, Claude! I can't wait to hear this in song.